My travels with anxiety

My travels with anxiety

When you work hard, you can sometimes find that your life is a rollercoaster of emotions.

You’re dealing constantly with people who have an agenda, and so you’re handling their emotions, too. It can be very distressing for you, your family and everyone around you when these emotions explode.

And explode they did.

One day this month, my wife an I were walking with our daughter through a park. It had been a particularly bad week at work and I’d dealt with four tribunals where employees had decided they weren’t being treated well.

Two of the meetings had ended up with walk-outs. One was simply a shouting match. All four of them ended with dismissal of the employees.

Case 1

This was a woman from accounts who had trouble keeping up payments on a holiday she’d bought earlier in the year. She is a single parent and she’d taken her son on the holiday of a lifetime to Disney.

She couldn’t afford it though, so she’d put it on a credit card. A card she couldn’t afford to keep up the payments on. So, she was siphoning off expenses. She was stealing.

When we discovered it, we decided to help by offering support. We offered an advance of wages and to help her move to a better credit card. She was proud, though, and she refused. She saw it as an invasion of privacy and refused help.

We couldn’t leave it at that, so she was offered help, or she had to leave.

She left.

She’s now without a job. She still has bills.

I really don’t understand why someone would do that. Why would someone give up everything and refuse help? She probably thinks she’ll be better off on benefits. She won’t.

Case 2

One of our salespeople isn’t very good. Wasn’t very good.

We let him go as per our terms. They get six months to show they can do the job and actually¬†sell something and then they have to go. Even so, even with all the paperwork and the contract, telling a young man he had to hand over his car, his phone and simply walk out the door isn’t nice.

He hates me.

Case 3

This one is currently involving the police.

This guy was taking equipment out of the warehouse and selling them on a local market.


Case 4

This one is the worst.

A young man with a young family. His son is very ill, terminal apparently.

However, he’s not very good at his job. To be honest, I think he can be trained, but the board says no, he has to go.

So I have to fire him. I’m really not pleased about this. And it takes its toll.

What happened?

So here we are in the park and a youth, say, 15 years old, rides right in front of us on his bike, nearly knocking my wife over.

I go absolutely crazy, shouting at this kid, but I go one further and start running after him. I catch him and push him off his bike on to the floor. I pick the bike up and I’m about to throw it to the ground and I stop.

I could really have hurt him. So, I need to stop.

And that’s why I’m writing my journey down.




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